Dr. Madison Johnson was exhausted. She had completed four surgeries in the past twenty-four hours, and the last one had been the most grueling: an emergency appendectomy on a seven-year-old. The girl, Tessa, had been at a sleepover when her pain had started. It had taken a few hours for her friend’s parents to realize how sick she was. Tessa’s appendix had already ruptured, but Madison was able to remove it and get her started on antibiotics to try to prevent any further complications.
“Great job in there, Johnson,” Dr. Gregg Rogers said as he passed her in the scrub room. “Not many fourth-year residents could handle that kind of situation as well as you just did. Inform the family, then go home. You deserve it.”
“Thank you, sir,” Madison replied. Dr. Rogers was the head of the Pediatric Surgery department, a position she hoped to hold herself one day. His compliment meant a lot to her and her future goals.
She fixed her blonde ponytail and headed to the nurses’ station to get Tessa’s chart. She needed to find out if the young girl’s own parents had made it to the hospital yet. She had had to take Tessa in to surgery before they could arrive.
Madison finished writing her notes in the chart. “Are her parents here?” she asked the night nurse, as she clicked her pen.
“Yes, Ethan Carter, her father, is in the waiting room.”
Madison felt her blood drain from her face. Ethan Carter, it couldn’t be. The name was a ghost from her past, a name that she never even let herself remember.
“Dr. Johnson, are you alright?” the nurse asked her. “Do you need to sit down?”
Madison forced herself to smile, and began to back away from the nurse’s station. “No, thank you. I’m fine. I’m going to go find Mr. Carter.”
As she walked, she focused on her breathing, trying to right her unsteady heartbeat. She worked to convince herself that it was just a coincidence, someone with the exact same name as…
Madison froze as she entered the waiting room. There he was. Ethan Carter. Even after ten years of time, distance, and heartache, she would always know him. Always know his deep auburn eyes and his wavy brown hair. The way he moved would always be engraved in her mind.
He hadn’t noticed her yet, which was for the best. She needed a moment to stop the memories that were swirling around her. She tried to breathe, tried to focus on her job. But she couldn’t. She just couldn’t…
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The snow was falling as quiet and soft as a feather, creating the perfect Christmas. It wasn’t sticking, but no one cared. In Arizona, it was rare enough that it was snowing at all.
Maddie walked through the neighborhood, taking everything in. The streets were lined with white luminary bags, the houses decorated with twinkling lights. The atmosphere brought peace to her tired mind. She was home from college, and needed the break.
“Maddie!” she heard from behind her. She turned to see Ethan Carter, her boyfriend and best friend of six years, running towards her. He had forgotten something at his house, so he had sent her outside and told her he’d catch up. He loved Christmas more than anyone she knew, and he looked as excited as some of the five-year-olds that were around them. He reached her, gasping for air, cheeks red from the chill in the air. He took her hand.
“Isn’t it perfect?” He asked her, his whole face lit up by a smile.
Maddie smiled, loving the way his hand felt in hers, even after so much time. “It is,” she answered. “It’s beautiful.”
“Hmmm. Yeah, it is. But not nearly as beautiful as you,” he said as he squeezed her hand. Maddie felt herself blush. “Come on, I need to show you something.”
Maddie let Ethan lead her through their neighborhood, back towards his house. “Why are we going back?” she asked him.
Ethan looked at her, and she saw that he looked nervous. “You’ll see,” he said just loud enough for her to hear him. Maddie nodded, and they continued around the corner.
When they reached his front yard, Maddie stopped. Ethan had decorated the house for Christmas weeks ago, but somehow in the last half hour, he had changed everything. He had taken small white lights, and created a winding path through the gravel. Along the path were small tables, with several framed pictures of the two of them throughout the years.
“Ethan…what is all this?” Maddie asked, tears in her voice. Ethan turned to face her, and took both of her hands.
“This is our story,” he whispered as he leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.
They began walking down the path, stopping to look at each of the pictures he had chosen. The first one showed them sitting together on the bleachers at a football game their freshmen year of high school. She was wearing a cheerleading uniform, something her parents had forced her to do, even though she hated it. Ethan had helped her find the strength to quit. When quitting changed her relationship with her parents, he never left her side. His family became her family.
There were pictures from dinner and movie dates, roller blading, school dances, high school graduation, college orientation, and everything in between. They laughed at the silly moments, and smiled at the more serious memories. They reached the last table, where all the frames were empty.
“Why are they empty?” Maddie asked.
Ethan cleared his throat, and locked his eyes onto hers. “They’re empty because these pictures haven’t been taken yet. They’re our future.” He paused for a second and swallowed. “Maddie, I know we’re barely even twenty, but I know I love you. I’ve loved you since the ninth grade, and I know you love me. I know we still have school, and you’ll have medical school. But Maddie, I want to be there for all of it. We need to be together through all of it.”
Maddie had started crying long before Ethan dropped to one knee and pulled the ring out of his pocket. She wiped her cheeks, sniffed, and took a deep breath. Ethan did the same.
“Madison Joy Johnson, will you marry me?” he looked into her eyes, waiting for her answer.
Maddie didn’t have to think about her answer. She knew it better than she knew her own name. She tried to control her tears, but she couldn’t. She nodded, “Yes, Ethan, yes I will marry you.”
Ethan slid the ring onto her finger and stood up, taking Maddie into his arms. They stood like that, holding each other as the snow continued to fall around them.
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“Maddie…” The sound of his voice pulled her back into the present. Madison blinked, and attempted to pull herself back together.
“Ethan…” She paused, trying to figure out what to say. She looked into his eyes, almost losing herself, and knew she only had one option. She sighed. “Tessa’s appendix ruptured. I was able to remove it, and we checked her thoroughly. She’s on antibiotics, and we’ll need to watch her. If all goes well, there won’t be any complications.
Ethan hesitated, as if he, too, was caught up in the past. He looked down and nodded. When he looked back at her, there were tears in his eyes as well. “Thank you,” he whispered. “Thank you, Maddie…” His hand reached for hers, and she had to quickly back away.
“I’ll get a nurse and she’ll take you to her,” Madison turned and moved out of the waiting room.
“Maddie, Maddie, wait!” Ethan called after her as she left.
But she didn’t stop, she couldn’t stop. The tears were coming fast and hard, and her heart was breaking faster than her steps. She reached an on-call room and slipped inside, locking the door behind her. She succumbed to her sobs, crying for the love she had lost, but also for the girl she had once been. No one had called her Maddie in ten years; hearing his voice say that name opened up the chasm in her heart that she had sewn shut a long time ago. As she sobbed into the worn hospital pillow, she wondered if she would ever be able to close it again.
